Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs

This is a very interesting theory of human needs. There are five levels to this pyramid theory, and once you read through, it makes perfect sense of the human priority list. At the very bottom of the list, the base needs, are such things as water, food, air, and a couple of others. These basic needs are not all equal though. A person can go weeks without food, but only a few days without water. So, human nature tells us to look for water before finding food. If you happened to be thirsty to the point of dehydration, but someone is cutting off your air supply, the need to breathe takes precedent. As you go up the pyramid, the needs become a little more specific. The next level discusses personal safety and shelter. The level after that, brings out the need for belonging. This means being a part of a family, a church, a fraternity, a community, etc. The fourth level discusses the need for gaining self respect and the respect of others. Self respect should come first because it cannot be lost as easy as respect from others. The first four levels are referred to as the 'need levels'. Once all of these needs are fulfilled, there is the desire for more. When one of these needs has been taken away, the human tendency is to go down the ladder to reacquire the basic needs. For instance, if all four levels of needs are met, but your house catches fire, the immediate need is safety. After everyone appears safe and accounted for, the next concern is shelter, and you climb your way back up the pyramid. The final level of the pyramid is the self actualization level. Once all other human needs are met, we tend to pursue Morality, Beauty, Unity, Creativity, Perfection, Completion, Justice, Simplicity, Richness, Playfulness, Self Sufficiency, and a few others. If you find yourself in poverty, these needs are secondary, and sometimes never considered for the fact you live from day to day. I know this was a deep subject, and 'yes' there will be a test! I didn't happen to find anywhere in his theory, the need for spirits, alcohol, libations, brew, or happy hour. Apparently a flawed theory:)

Where Did My Pen Go?

We have a theory at our house, and maybe this is the case at yours also. We seem to lose pens and pencils at an alarming rate. We think lost pens turn into wire coat hangers, and end up in our closets. Truth be told, I believe my children are the culprits of the mysterious vanishing pens. Of course if you ask them, they're going to deny it and refuse to answer anymore questions without their lawyer present. I've informed my wife not to buy expensive pens, because if we have literary rodents that steal them, we don't want to be out a lot of money. Some other items that seem to walk off of my desk from time to time, are the scotch tape holder and stapler. Sticky note pads are like an irresistible bait for desk thieves. My youngest thinks it's fun to grab a pad of stickies and write a number on each page until she either runs out of paper, or she has counted as far as her limited education has taken her. Every once in awhile, I have to go shake the kids down, and retrieve my desk belongings, and threaten them with solitary confinement. This is probably the one instance where the dog is actually innocent. Unless, of course, he was an accomplice, such as a lookout or the driver of the getaway car. Chances are, the lovable children under my watch, acted alone. I think they know better than to take my architect's ruler. I want that at my disposal the very moment I'm looking for it. If it's not there, or where I believe it should be, heads will roll! I've thought about video surveillance, but I'm sure that would end up in a bedroom, filming an amateur singing video, or endless tape of the dog sleeping or licking himself. I may have to resort to electric cattle fence or barbed wire!

Who's Coming for Dinner?

I'm really not a person who seems to be star struck. There are certain people who have the knack to entertain me, but I would rather just invite them over for Sunday brunch, or go have a beer with them someplace. Some folks intrigue me, but I don't want to attack them in a fanatical way and rip their clothes off. I just want to chat over coffee and ask semi personal questions that only good friends or family members would know about them. I would have to say, my top 5 list would include: 1. Dave Matthews and the band. Ask about dirt on the other band mates and run a few lines to an impromptu song by them. 2. Warren Buffet. How do I make this $10 bill in my pocket, into a $20 bill without lifting a finger? 3. John Cusack. Favorite actor, reminisce about the movie, BETTER OFF DEAD. Ask if his sister really is a nut bar? 4. Tom Osborne and Bo Pelini together. Discuss bringing back the option (just kidding), and bringing back Joe Ganz under an alias with some plastic surgery. Try to get Tom to drink a beer or two with me. 5. David Gilmore and Roger Waters. We need to talk about getting the band back together, and we could just have a little personal concert / jam session, just me and Pink Floyd. This time spent with me doesn't have to be an all day affair, unless THEY want to hang out for the day. I don't expect them to be my new BFF and have my number on speed dial, just an occasional 'hello', or tickets would be a thoughtful gesture on their part. I'm really a low maintenance comrade. I won't even blog brag to my cyber audience... for an hour or two:)

How's The Weather?

Often times, just to break the silence, we'll ask someone their opinion of the weather. Do we really want to know their take, or are we trying to overcome an awkward silence? I would say 9 times out of 10, it's the latter. Some people are weather junkies (you know who you are), and love to talk about cold fronts, barometric pressure, hook echoes, etc. etc. You could probably make a drinking game by watching the weather channel. If the weather lady says, 'heat index', everybody drinks! Lately the weather has been rather sedentary. No heat waves, no tornados, no hail or thunderstorms, all in all, pretty darn nice. I would imagine nice weather like we're having is probably a downer for the weather man and those who like to chase storms. I personally would be perfectly content if the weather were this mild year around. I like excitement, just not in cloud formation. Sorry weather junkies, find another hobby. Fair weather fans enjoy!

No Reservations

Maybe you've seen the show on the Travel channel, Anthony Bourdain - No Reservations? Anthony is a chef who travels the world to examine and consume the local food and culture. He not only stays away from the chain restaurants, but completely abhors the ideas of being within walking distance. He has a rather adventurous palate, eating things that one wouldn't think consumable. I must admit, I would like to eat vicariously through Mr. Bourdain. Another thing I appreciate about the show is, he searches out local customs also. The main reason for the show is to highlight cuisine, but while on location, he takes in the sights and sounds of the area. He has a tendency to tease and torment his camera crew, but they have a pretty good gig too. He's been everywhere and has indulged in pork from all over the world! How bad can that be? And the thing that really just ices the show for me, is his witticism. Apparently he's been dissed by the Food Network at some time in his career. His snide, sarcastic remarks toward the Food Network and Rachel Ray make for a little competitive, in your face, "mom" bashing, reality TV. I'm sure he wishes no ill will upon anyone, but on the other hand, if those two entities were to go away tomorrow, he would have to put on an extremely good act to convince me he was sad about it. And it's a good thing the editor button works. He doesn't really let curse words slip as he does fly. I hate to quote SpongeBob here, but in Anthony's case, those are just "sentence enhancers". I also like the fact, he narrates some of it, rather than talk at us the whole time. Sometimes it's fun to listen to a story, rather than be lectured and face a test afterward. The people from around the world he's met, and the friends, and or enemies, he's made over the course of the series, are some of the most interesting folks. Most seem to have a culinary background, or the very least, a good knowledge of local faire. For now, No Reservations remains at the top of the Kevin TV viewing list, all others are number two. Cheers A.B.

Telemarketers

I know everybody hates getting the phone call while you're right in the middle of something, especially when it's a telemarketer. I, like many, subscribe to the national "do not call list", but apparently that's for the telemarketers to call you and find out if you were directing your unhospitableness towards them, and while they have you as their captive audience, slip in a sales pitch. I'm no different. I hate being bothered while in the middle of something (especially the rare time allotted for a nap), to take a phone call for some insurance to cover the insured small amount of money I have in the bank, or to donate to the deputy sheriff's college education fund for their children, when my children are probably going to have to pay for a lot of their own post education themselves. But, while you have me on the phone, and you're going to give me your best line, and segway into my billing information without actually asking whether this is something I would be interested in, or could use, I'm going to play along to waste your time since you're wasting mine. Eye for an eye. I'm going to try to get your product for free for life, or, since I can't afford whatever crap your pitching, I'm going to try to get you to donate to my cause. I'm sure the US government would be a little upset because I gave my hard earned tax money to something frivolous. So I can accept donations towards my annual tax burden if they would like to make that payment at this time. I do accept credit cards. Instead of donating to the presidential campaign, maybe they could help me campaign for the small amount of money I need to purchase school books for my children. Since we homeschool, it all comes out of my pocket, plus I get the benefit of NOT being able to take a deduction on my taxes. So if you call me because you're interested in my little amount of money, rather than me personally, be prepared to be harassed for a donation or 3 easy payments, whichever you prefer. I'll even put you on my email list and give you current updates on my lifestyle and progress I'm making. I'll even call while you're just sitting down for dinner if you like?

Blind Coke Drinker

This was a funny observation today. I was at HyVee with some friends. I walked up to the soda dispensing station while another friend was standing there. Now, the soda station is quite extensive, having more filling stations than the BP gas station. My friend noticed above the Cherry Coke and Diet Coke, were small strips written in Braille. Apparently those are the only two flavors of pop blind people are allowed to drink, or care to drink. Which brings me to the drive up atm. The key pad is available in Braille also. I think it's rather humorous and a bit scary at the same time, knowing a blind person could pull their car into the atm, get cash, and drive off. I think I might introduce a form of entertainment to the blind populace. I think a Braille dart board would be entertaining on a couple of different levels;)

Funerals

My wife's uncle died this past week. I'm surprised it didn't overshadow Michael Jackson's death a few weeks ago. No, seriously, I know a fellow human died, but some people are probably better off. I know that sounds cold, but if you knew this man, you'd probably agree. He had no friends, lived the life of a hermit, drank and smoked to an excess, and lived in a dilapidated house in squalor. The quality of life was less than desirable you could say. He had numerous medical ailments that he's dealt with for years, but has probably outlasted people who actually cared about their health. He wasn't even really that nice of a person, very cynical, self righteous, and condescending. He's at rest now, which is likely the happiest he's been in many decades. The funeral, if that's what you call it, is just a ceremony at the funeral home, with some folks uttering some niceties, and maybe a hope for the future. Life needs to be enjoyed, not squandered. It's short and glutted with agitation, wrote a famous author. Try to make it the best life you know how, for yourself and those around you. Burdensome people are just so.... burdensome! As far as the funeral goes, I personally think simple is best. First of all, it shouldn't cost a lot of money to die. Second, you're dead, what do you have to offer anyone anymore? Discuss the memories with those who are living, hold out a hope for the future, and encourage everyone in attendance to live life like it was meant to be enjoyed. Amen.

They're Everywhere!

The wildlife recently, has been extremely close to the city, and within the city. I've seen two deer, on two different occasions this week. First was near my shop out in Irvington. That's close enough to rural community that you might expect to see deer from time to time. The second was on the exit ramp from I80 at 42nd St. That poor thing is probably road kill by now. Plus, I've seen wild turkey twice this week. One lone tom walking along I680 around Fort St., and then at 120th St., between State St. and Military Rd. there were five at the road's edge. I have seen more turkey in the last five years than I've seen my previous 38 years. As a kid, I may not have paid as much attention to my surroundings, but you think I would have seen a couple growing up in Nebraska. When I was a teenager, I used to hunt with friends and relatives, and I don't recall ever seeing a single turkey. Trust me, I would have unloaded on one with probably nothing to show but a bunch of empty shells. Which brings me to my next species eyewitness sighting. I had a pheasant fly directly in front of my truck a couple of months ago. My guess is about twelve feet or less between my windshield and him. I'm positive it was a "him". And I hear one all the time in the field behind our shop, which happens to be a dairy farm. And to top it off, I was on my way home from work Friday evening, driving through the new Aksarben Village area, and a skunk starts to run into the street, but at the last minute, saw his life flash before his eyes, and changed his mind. I'm just guessing it was a "him". I've never seen a skunk that far into the city. Must be here on vacation. I almost feel as if I'm in an episode of WILD KINGDOM, with Marlin Perkins. I'm his sidekick, Jim, who almost gets eaten by sharks, alligators, piranhas, or some man eating African ants. I feel the wildlife is closing in and making me enjoy the variety of species in the animal kingdom. Can't they just go back to being on TV, and leave me be? Can't they just show up at the grocery store, already prepackaged? Why do they have to run/fly in front of my truck, and risk death? Can't they just take a lesson from the flattened squirrel who didn't quite make it? Where's Marlon when you need him?

Fast Food

We all know how bad it is for us. We know America is obese because of it. I'm sure most of us have seen SUPERSIZE ME. Does that prevent us from shoveling in an occasional whopper, taco, french fried, pizza combo? No. Why is that? If I offered you arsenic, would you ingest it? No! But how about in small amounts? I'm slamming fast food today, because I succumbed to the wretched, freaky, plastic headed Burger King. I don't know what sucks me into that black hole of a fast food chain. In my mind, a Whopper sure does sound good. I should listen to my stomach, which says, Kevin, I'll make you pay if you put that in your mouth and swallow. It's called fast food because of the speed in which it's produced. Once I have possession of my "fast food", I eat it just as fast as they squirted it out the window. I hardly take a breath, and I never put the sandwich down until every last vestige of calorific goodness has been slam dunked down my throat. I don't normally eat that fast, but for some reason... it's like I'm a lion with a fresh kill, and I have to engorge myself before the rest of the pride arrives to tear off their portion. There's really nothing appealing about the establishment either. No ambience, no art work, no comfortable seating and pleasant background music... what's the draw!? You stand in line behind the woman with five kids, who tries do decide what every last hungry little bird wants to eat, the moment they get to the cash register. Then, there's the guy behind you who smells of a combination of motor oil, grass clippings, body odor, and cigarettes. That alone should turn your stomach, and make you want to walk out. But no! You're on a quest for the almighty Whopper of Love! Then there's the soda pop station. It's usually low on ice, and every last square inch of it is sticky. Oh, don't forget the ketchup! You can either put it into the little cups provided, which, every last one of them has been handled, and strewn like confetti, or just scoop it up off of the counter. Finally, food in hand, condiments, drink, but no place to sit. Oh wait, there is one spot. But first, somebody needs to clean up the apparent murder scene that happened prior to you arriving. Some of that garbage is unrecognizable. I wasn't aware they served that here? So, the zit faced 16 year old assistant to the assistant manager cleans your table with water, and the same dish rag used to plug up the leaking P trap in the bathroom, and you're all set. Enjoy!

Fidelity

Fidelity is continued faithfulness to a person or cause. Most often it is referred to a married couple. This day and age, marriage is a possession of convenience. People go into a marriage thinking, "If it doesn't work, I can always get a divorce". What a horrible way to think about the person you've committed your life to! According to the Bible, the only real grounds for divorce is infidelity, or adultery. Also, if the spouses life is in danger due to physical abuse, by all means, leave. Think about the wedding vows that were taken at the ceremony. Both parties agreed to stay together 'til death do you part'. Do people really understand what they're reciting in the presence of God and all those witnesses? It also mentions 'for better or for worse'. We all have ups and downs in our marriage, but when the going gets a little rocky, that's the time to circle the wagons, and face the problems unitedly, NOT throw up the white flag and surrender! What many fail to realize, marriage is not always the blissful horseback ride into the sunset. I heard someone mention once, "Marriage is NOT a 50/50 agreement. It's 110% effort by two imperfect people". There are going to be hard times, be prepared. If you know that going into the relationship, you should be mentally prepared to accept that. Plus, don't forget about the good times. Bad times are not forever, they just SEEM to take a long time to get through. So don't rely on short term thinking, work hard to overcome your obstacles, and make the best of your situation. If you want to feel good about yourself, do something good for someone else, namely your spouse.

Mistaken Identity

There's nothing quite as embarrassing as being in a crowded public place with your spouse, leaving for a moment, returning and putting your arm around, what you believe to be your wife, but as fate has it, a total stranger. Yes, it's actually happened to me twice since I've been married. The first time I didn't fully commit to the arm around the shoulder. I happen to catch sight of the person's face and was able to jerk my arm back before there was an uncomfortable moment. The second time, I did go through with the whole action. Fortunately, it happened to be someone I know. I quickly made a joke of it and said, "Wait a minute, you're not my wife! What are you doing with my arm around you?" At those moments, you can just feel your face flushing with color, and realize that Mr. Cool has to receive a kick to the ego. There was another instance, this time I was on the receiving end, where a little boy came up to me as I was talking to another friend, and he reached up to hold my hand. I thought, "What a friendly little boy." So as we stood there, hand in hand for a couple of seconds, he saw his father standing a few feet away, realized the grave mistake he had made, started to cry and ran to the safety of his dad. After seeing his dad, I see the erroneous thinking on the boy's part. His dad wears glasses, just as I do, he was wearing blue dress pants with a gold checked jacket, which you could have sworn my wife must have dressed him that night also. Honest mistake young man, and I feel your pain. So my advice to all of you, beware of your surroundings, pay attention before offering public displays of affection, and I don't think it's too much to even ask to see their ID. All I've got to say is, I'm glad I haven't developed the habit of the friendly little love tap on my wife's butt! See ya in court!

Jane, Get Me Off This Crazy Thing!

Sorry, I've neglected you all for a couple of days. Life and work have gotten a little crazy lately. Two months ago, I wasn't very busy at work, thus the daily spouting forth of useless, time gulping, empty headed, fodder from yours truly. Well I thought I would take a moment, get off the carnival ride called "life", and reassure all 3 of my concerned readers, that I'm still with you. It's all right, take a breath. My spare time this last week or so, has been spent eating and sleeping, but not too much of either. Lack of sleep makes me want to blog about "lack of sleep", but I'm too tired to finish what I'm writing, and then my finger gets stuck on the "d" key, and then the post makes no sense. Besides, my family gets a little upset when I drool on the keyboard. Culinarily speaking, I've been very uninspired about food also. I just shovel it in, whatever happens to come to rest in front of my mouth, and move on. Well we're going to have to cut this short, and save some time wasting nonsense for the next round. In the words of Carol Burnett, "I'm glad we had this time together."

Family Weekend

Had a really good weekend. That's kind of important, since work is heating up, all at once, and I may not have another fun and relaxing weekend for awhile. My little sis was in town (without kids) and we went to Fremont Lakes, where some of the family was camping, and had a cookout. We were last minute invites, but decided to participate. My uncle, the generous soul he is, informed me not to worry about food or drink, there would be plenty. Of course, he provided the beer:( I realize I've become a beer snob over the years, but I played along, and insulted my taste buds with cheap light beer. He stuck one in my hand the minute I stepped out of the car, and proceeded to force inferior canned faux beer on me all afternoon. Funny thing happened, I drank beer for beer with my uncle, never received the slightest buzz, relieved myself twice, and wound up with an instant headache once I stopped and ate something. I'm just happy I didn't pay money to feel that crappy. But, the food, family, and conversation were great! Caught up with some non - relatives I haven't seen in quite some time. That was nice to see everybody healthy and doing OK. Spent the remainder of the evening out at the man cave, talking and enjoying the evening air. Sunday morning we met the same uncle and aunt at our favorite greasy spoon - Louie M's Burger Lust, down on 18th & Vinton St. Once again, food, family, and conversation was pleasant. After breakfast, we got my younger sibling on the road home, back to her boys. We took the kids bowling, after that, to the Old Market for ice cream at our favorite ice cream establishment - Ted & Wally's, a little shopping, a walk down by the ConAgra fountain, and then home. Whew! I'm just as tired writing as I was walking earlier. After arriving back at the homestead, I sat in bed, working on the Sunday paper sudoku and crossword puzzle, til I dozed off for about an hour and a half. We topped the evening off with consuming a light meal and watching a movie. Sent the kids to bed, and now it's my turn. As I tell my daughter every evening at bedtime, "see ya in the manana". I think that's Spanish for something?

Red Light, Green Light.

Remember playing that game as a kid? You try to catch the person moving so you can send them back to the start. Lots of fun as a kid, but not so much as an adult. Let me explain. When you're sitting at the stoplight, at say 72nd & Dodge St., and your light turns green, you ALWAYS catch the person moving... thru the intersection on a red light. You really rack up points on a day like today, when you catch three red light offenders rolling thru! But wait, it gets even better. There's the uninsured 1980, rusted out, smoking mosquito screen, GMC conversion van, with a crew of illegal alien roofers, who have never played RED LIGHT, GREEN LIGHT, as a kid. They have played FOLLOW the LEADER though, and proceed thru the intersection 10 seconds later than the previous three cheaters of RED LIGHT, GREEN LIGHT. That makes for an interesting game. They almost were involved in a game of TAG, which would have led to a game of DOCTOR and/or COPS and ROBBERS. Sadly, the game would have ended though, when somebody was jacking around, and put out an eye! Then they would have been happy! I'm not sure how much more sarcasm I can fit into this entry. If you haven't caught on yet, you're IT!

Subject to Change

Schedules are important, so I've been told. So I make it a point to sit down, spend some time figuring out which jobs are going to happen where and when, and then throw it out the window or blow my nose in it. It's practically impossible to make and maintain a schedule based on peoples' performances ahead of your own. All it takes is one person to lag behind, or one company to delay shipment, and the pressure is now on! I recently experienced a setback in scheduling, due to lack of communication on the homeowner's part. She had sent me an email asking when I could start her job. I sat down, scrutinized my schedule, and sent her back a starting date along with an invoice for down payment. I was waiting for a response plus a check for about two weeks. Finally, we were within two days of starting, so I initiate contact and tell her, we are going to start two days from now. She promptly emails back, bringing me up to present, so I can "adjust my schedule", that I'm not the one doing her project. She found someone cheaper, but they can't start for another month. She was willing to wait for the savings. Fortunately, I hadn't ordered any material, which would come with a 20% restocking fee. Her job would take about two and a half weeks to accomplish from start to finish. So now I adjust my schedule? I had nothing planned but her job for the next two and a half weeks! I hope she doesn't call me back when her "cheap" help is learning to set tile on her job, and she realizes the mistake she's made. I'll probably step in to save the day, first, on MY schedule, not hers! And second, with my "revised" estimate for work to be accomplished. Nothing beats a pay raise! Some people need to learn, "You don't mess with mother nature", and "You don't drop a bomb on Kevin's schedule". In my opinion, the reason a schedule is made in the first place, is to convey optimism. It's fun to get the person's hope up, and get them to commit. Then, welcome to the real world! Your schedule is just a pipe dream meant to make YOU feel good, and to make everybody else crazy trying to maintain it. Folks are always asking me, "when do you think the tile will be finished?". My response, "Well let me check my schedule. When the last piece of tile is set, your job should be complete". That narrows it down to the exact time. You can't get any closer than that!

NASCAR Circuit

I have some friends who get together once a year for a very special sporting event. I don't know how many years they've been doing it, but they bring their fastest, modified, late model cars to the track and race. There's a trophy for the winner, obviously, and the ceremonial glass of milk afterwards. The track is orange and snap together with red pieces of plastic tabs. The cars range from classic to custom to outlandish. If you crawl underneath the car, you'll see the brand says "Hot Wheels". That's right, "Hot Wheels". Yup, grown men getting together to relive their childhood and race their Hot Wheels. This friend has been buying track on ebay for several years now, and has about 300 feet of the orange track my mom used to whip me with when I was being "less than cooperative". So I'm the rookie driver this year, and I hope I don't embarrass myself my first time out. I don't even have a car yet. I may have to steal one of my kids' cars. It's really a shame, when I was a youngster, I had upwards of 300 Hot Wheels and Matchbox cars. I know there were a few that were very good track cars. You could tell by the weight of the car and how easy the wheels would spin. I don't know what happened to my collection. I lost interest when I got old enough to drive life size cars, and I don't know what mom did with them. I hope some child is playing with them right now. A few years back, my wife and I were walking through an antique mall, and saw some Hot Wheels for sale. There was one listed for $30! I had three of them in two different colors! CRAP! No need to cry over lost riches. Regardless, I'm looking forward to the race day. I think it might be another excuse to drink beer, also. Of course the drinking will take place after the driving, so nothing to worry about.

The Hardware Store

Going to the hardware/home improvement center for me, is no different than taking a 5 year old to Toys R Us. Many times, I'm in somewhat of a hurry, so I make a list, enter the store, find what I came for, load it up, check out the sales, think about the home projects I have, look around the store for that, think about the tools I might need (whether worn out or borrowed, which means they won't be returned), pick up tools, look at tools I don't necessarily need, enter the checkout, grab one last item at the checkout (screwdriver bits, batteries, gum, etc.), and then pay. I think it's amusing when the checker asks, "Did find everything you were looking for today"? Little do they know, my excursions to the hardware store are about 98% successful, with a 50% chance of picking up extra "essentials". I wonder if this is the same phenomena that overcomes a woman when she enters a department store? All I know is, when I walk into the hardware store, I feel as if I've walked into the store made just for me! The hardware stores gotta love me, because I sure do love them.

Fireworks

You know, fireworks are a blast, literally! I will admit, I do love a good fireworks show! And I've enjoyed fireworks ever since I can remember. It must be the perfect combination of light, color, and noise that attracts a young boy and holds him over to adulthood. I still find myself oohing and aahing over the beautiful explosives. They seem to be better developed now than when I was a kid. Now they can make the outline of actual objects appear in the sky after they've gone off. Of course, the finale is always, well,... the finale. It seems they throw a match in a barrel of explosives, stand back, and see what happens! That sure is a cool gig. I wonder how I can get a job blowing things up?

Where Have You Been?

No, you're not in trouble. It's not the type of question that's supposed to make you submit to guilt. It's the type of question to log your travels through the US.
visited 28 states (56%)
Create your own visited map of The United States or Like this? try: Sea Level Rise

Doo Dahing Around

Now I'm not a person who really experiences road rage, but I find myself becoming more impatient in traffic, with people just puttin' along 10 miles per hour under the speed limit. Today was especially frustrating. First, I was stuck behind an older couple who were driving extremely slow with their foot on the brake the whole time. I couldn't pass because traffic was heavy, and no room to squeeze in to change lanes. In my truck, you don't really squeeze into anywhere. Of course I was in a hurry, not hugely so, but a little rushed. As we're idling down the road, the older driver is anticipating the red light. He can see the hand flashing on the stop light to warn pedestrians the light is going to turn yellow. The light is still green and we are slowing to a crawl, so we don't accidentally make it thru the green light with plenty of time to spare. Well, I finally turned onto another street, and was only about 10 minutes late. No harm, no foul. Later in the day, I was driving on another busy street, behind someone from Ft. Calhoun (the county number on the plate tells me so), and they seem to be lost, because we're progressing at a rate that I can't actually keep up with the bicyclist next to us. I'm pretty sure they were lost unless they were just practicing their turn signals, and pretending to drive drunk, wandering from lane to lane, to prevent anyone from passing. I finally maneuver my way around with some creative driving, only to be stopped by a flock of about 30 geese crossing the road. Of course the cars pulling up and stopping, freak out the last five and they turn back around and cross in front of me again, further slowing my progress. I must admit, it took a lot of patience on my part today, to not FLIP! It's a good thing I wasn't listening to head banger music, I may have used my vehicle as a plow to give a few love taps today! Maybe I should just look at the clouds while driving. That would be tranquil and relaxing, and I'll just assume those are speed bumps I'm going over;)

Gene Pool

Genetics are fun boys and girls! My oldest daughter hates me because of her hair. My youngest has to wear glasses because of poor eyesight on my side of the family. I am the proud displayer of a David Letterman or Alfred E. Newman smile, which ever you choose to poke fun at me. I'm going to steal a line from my dad, since he's the one who "blessed" me with my diastema. I could probably floss my teeth with a jump rope:) Outside of gross physical defects, I think genetics are kind of fun. My daughters also have my chin, affectionately referred to at our house, as the "butt" chin. They've also been burdened with too much facial hair, but in my defense, their mom is a sufferer also. Eye color is definitely mom's. Both have brown eyes, but each a different shade of brown. Skin tone on the older, from me, the younger, from mom. Grandmas always have fun with genetics. Of course, the good looking traits are always from their side of the family. Oh look, that young un' has cousin Chester's cheekbones. I doubt it, cousin Chester was actually the next door neighbor. Look at the size of that toddler's head. Nobody on OUR side of the family has a head that size. Sure they do, they're just adults now. So, no matter how big your nose is, or how far apart your eyes are, or your widow's peak, you should at least thank a parent for the opportunity to pass on your family defects to the next generation. C'mon in everyone, the water in the gene pool is warm!

Old, New

Back in January, the neighbor to the south of us finally sold his house. He had it up for sale for quite some time. If you've ever seen the movie MONEY PIT, with Tom Hanks and Shelly Long, this guy actually lived it. To start, he overpaid for the dump. Houses in the area were going for around $100,000, he paid $127,00 for a fixer upper. He's from California, so in his mind, he was getting a smokin' deal. He hired a "born again" contractor, who openly expressed his arrogant pomp, whenever he spoke to you, and ended up taking my neighbor to the cleaners for about $180,000. The scope of the project was quite extensive. He basically took the house down to the foundation, did a small addition, added the garage from hell, and rebuilt the whole house. Needless to say, the first contractor was fired. The second contractor arrives to save the day. They pretty much unraveled everything the first contractor did, because of code violations, and started from scratch. Finally, after two years of construction/destruction/construction, the house was, for the most part, finished. He had workers over, off and on, to do small things, but he was actually living there. Not too long after, he had a small stroke (if you met this guy , you'd understand), and decided to move where there were other people living in close vicinity, because he was afraid to live alone. After putting all this time, money, and effort, he put the house up for sale. Last figure I heard was $380,000 for the price of the house plus remodel costs. It sold in January for $127,000. Our new neighbor moved in just last week. My old neighbor's misfortune continued after the sale, (some legal issues) that held up closing for the next six months. In the meantime, he lost out on a job opportunity in Texas, because he could not leave Nebraska until he got the house off his back. The new neighbor was very patient while waiting for all the legal "crap" to get cleaned up, living in a couple of different places, sleeping on friends' couches for weeks at a time. The day finally came! Old neighbor, free at last of his burden, new neighbor finally settles into his new castle. What an experience for both parties. The life stories they now both possess, are definitely worth telling. Hope they blog about it!