Mushrooms

I'm going camping this weekend. I'm not saying where, because I'm planning on giving my hand at hunting for morels. I've never actually found any, so I'm not holding my breath. And I'm aware that I am competing against the deer and all those greedy bastards that started hunting last week. I'm sure they've put a hurtin' on the supply. What really peeves me is when you see them parked on the side of the road selling their booty for $17.95/lb. I've only had morels twice in my life and I'm 43 now. Each time I got 1 mushroom - barely a taste! I'm extremely overdue. And I have a daughter who loves mushrooms and I would be thrilled if she could try one for the first time. So all you greedy hoarders of the highly coveted little fungi, YOU BETTER SAVE SOME FOR ME! If I don't find a mother lode, then I'll just stop this year and begrudgingly pay you your extortion money. If I new how to stick my tongue out with words, I would be doing that right now! I hope you accidentally eat a slug. See you in the forest:)