Man vs. Woman

I'm thinking of doing a series of blog entries involving the differences between a man and a woman. This is a man's perspective, so it should be somewhat biased. Sorry girls, you'll just have to play along. First noticeable difference I'd like to point out is body heat. My wife seems to have none. This time of the year, when the temperature and humidity are battling for the top billing for the day, I usually wear just enough clothes to remain legal. When I go to bed at night, it's down to the whitey tighties with no blankets or sheets. Do you have that image burned into your mind now? Good. There's nothing I hate more than perspiring in bed. My wife - the opposite sex, for those who just got here - is fully jammied up with at least a sheet, one blanket, and a comforter. I'm melting at just the thought. When winter rolls around, this is a brutal time of the year, here in the frozen tundra of Nebraska. Any sane person makes sure to wear extra garments, i.e., mittens, ear muffs, scarf, jock strap, boots, two pairs of socks, turtle neck, - whatever it takes to keep the appendages from turning blue and falling off. So on those bone chilling nights, when I tuck myself in, sometimes I'll slip on an undershirt. This time of the year, it would be foolish to not sleep under the covers, so I layer myself, a sheet, two blankets, and a comforter, to form a bedtime lasagna. My wife looks as if she's ready to go play in the snow, except for her feet. She slips in rather stealthily, and nestles up beside me to sap all my body heat, and then she hits me with two frozen bricks of ice, she likes to refer to as "feet", that almost send me into hypothermia! Have you ever touched dry ice? It will burn your skin, it's so cold. Same difference. I guess you could label us "fire and ice". Obviously, opposites attract. See ya for round 2.