Teeth, Who Needs Em?

Ahhh, my dear cousin Rik. The only true towhead of the lot. I'm sure an apology would be in store from me, and on behalf of your older brother, would be appropriate for the treatment (just shy of torture) we put you through. But if we apologized, that would mean we were sincerely sorry for our actions, beg for forgiveness, and pray that our past crimes never again resurface. So we can't do that. You were Keith's personal punching bag, stray dog, voodoo doll, and skid mark. You wanted to be bigger, and do the things the bigger kids were doing, but Keith was going to haze you to the nth degree, to make sure you were worthy. I think he made you cry almost every day of your life until you reached school, and were able to make friends outside of your immediate family. You wonder where Keith got it? From me. I did the exact same thing to him when he was that age. He was just helping you through your rite of passage to become a part of our family. You should really thank him for all his hard work. Especially the numerous times he would stick a football in your hands and tell you to start running. First of all, you were too small to even carry a football, so you had to hug it with both arms around it. Then Keith would chase you down, and tackle you. It was your typical 'David and Goliath' situation. The only difference - David won his battle - you never did. So Keith proceeds to play quarterback one day, and you were to fulfill the role of running back. You were pretty darn fast for a little guy, probably because of the daily terror you faced. But for once, it appears you and Keith are teammates? Keith calls out his cadence, the ball is hiked from his imaginary center, he turns, hands the ball off to you, and instantly is transformed into the ferocious linebacker. He chases you the length of the yard, all you have to do is reach the fence before he gets to you, and you're spared impending doom. He makes a last ditch effort, since you were just a few steps away, and dives for your feet and is able to trip you up. Since you kept the football in your hands, rather than dropping it (that would have been a fumble, Keith would have picked it up, then humiliated you by rubbing the fact in your face), you fell forward on the ball and hit your mouth on the tip of the ball, knocking out your two front teeth. Fortunately, (is this a fortunate event?) those were baby teeth he helped you remove from your smile. I remember the dentist making you a partial, and you being the youngest person I knew with false teeth. Another time, we were all out at dam site 16, fishing, I believe it was your first attempt at fishing. We had the perfect set up for a young kid. It was actually an ice fishing pole. Perfect length for a little kid to maneuver. So I got you all set up with a worm and bobber, and gave you a crash course on casting. You were a wild man! Your first cast hooked into your brother's sock. Got that out, so let's try again. Another cast shortly afterwards hooked into my elbow, and you couldn't understand what the hang up was, so you kept tugging, burying the hook further into my skin! I had to yell at you to stop while my arm is being flung involuntarily into the air. So I got that hook out. I then moved you down the bank about 15-20 yards away, and banned you from coming near the rest of mankind, while you were armed with a fishing pole. So about ten minutes goes by, and you're casting and reeling in as fast as you can, making it nearly impossible for any fish to even realize there's potential food in the water. Regardless, you weren't injuring anyone. Then you come walking over towards me, and I see you're crying. Keith is nowhere near you, so I'm a little puzzled why you would be experiencing trauma. You approach and cry, "Get it out Kev". I look, and see a waterlogged worm hanging off the back of your head, and the hook stuck in your scalp. I tried VERY hard not to laugh because you were in pain. But what a great story! I think I'm current on my tetanus shot, so if you would ever like to go fishing again, that would be OK.